redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
