u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i came on her dog
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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