the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
