It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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