If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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