dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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