Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
