So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
