its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
