Me. At least after what I've been through.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Boobs speak an international language.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
