just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
