i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
