Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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