ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
