White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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