Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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