Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
