I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
