quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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