Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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