Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
