she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
