She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
