there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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