apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
