i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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