Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
