I didn't shave. On purpose
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
