Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
