You made me cry and you don't even care
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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