She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
