Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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