the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
