quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
