The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
