I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
