You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Too much gin, very little bucket
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize