How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
