Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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