wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
