The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
