she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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