He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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