I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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