Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
