Whod you bang
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Slut skills are useful in every country.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
did i walk over a car last night?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Randomize
