you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
