Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize
