Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
