im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Randomize